The Pleasure of Discovery
Tammy Renée | Creating the Beautiful Life
4 min read
If you’ve spent any time in midlife already, you’ve probably experienced seasons when life seems to have lost some of its color—or when a vague sense of ennui settles in: a weariness, restlessness, or boredom with our day-to-day routines.
Now in my late 50s, I’ve become better at recognizing this feeling when it comes. And I’ve also come to understand that sometimes, what we need is simply to become interested in our lives again.
To notice what moves us to tears or makes us laugh. To follow our curiosities. To have something ahead of us that we can look forward to. To discover a song we’ve never heard, a place we’ve never been, an inspiring book found while strolling through a used bookstore, or an idea we’d never considered that suddenly gives us something new to think about.
Remain Interested in the World
One of the things I hope never happens as I grow older is that my world becomes smaller simply because I stop being curious about it.
There will always be things we don’t understand, people we haven’t met yet, and experiences we haven’t had. And I find that idea thrilling — that, no matter my age, there’s still so much left to discover.
Curiosity keeps us connected to a constantly changing world, and it also keeps something within us from becoming too settled. When we stay open to it, life can still surprise us.
This might mean learning about an artist whose work has always intrigued you, reading about a period of history you know nothing about, visiting a museum, trying a recipe from another culture, exploring a neighborhood you’ve never walked through, or finally understanding a piece of technology you once avoided because it seemed too confusing.
It matters less what we become curious about than that we continue to be curious at all.
I don’t ever want to reach a point when I’m thinking, I already know what I like and what interests me, so there’s nothing new here for me.
I want to remain interested in my life and the world around me.
Keep Adding to Your Life
There’s nothing wrong with returning to the songs, movies, books, places, and traditions we’ve always loved. They hold memories and connect us to special chapters of our lives and the people who were part of them.
My favorite music has always been old jazz standards by artists like Billie Holiday and Frank Sinatra. Their music belonged to an era before my own, but because older members of my family played those songs throughout my childhood, they became a major part of my story too. Even now, hearing one of those familiar tunes makes me happy down to my bones.
But I also don't want the soundtrack of my life to end in an earlier decade. I want to keep adding to it.
There’s something energizing about discovering a song you’ve never heard before and immediately loving it. The same is true of finding a wonderful old film for the first time, reading an author you somehow missed, or wandering into a place you’ve never been.
And that discovery doesn’t have to be new to the world. It only has to be new to you.
I think we need both as we grow older: the familiar things that make us feel rooted, as well as new discoveries that keep our lives expanding.
Have Something to Look Forward To
Earlier seasons of our lives seemed naturally filled with things to look forward to — new schools, new jobs, weddings, babies, houses, and family milestones. We made plans, imagined possibilities, and regularly found ourselves looking toward whatever came next. However, as life moves on and we settle into more familiar routines.
Anticipation is one of life's underrated joys — because part of the pleasure of a beautiful experience is everything that comes before it: the research, the planning, the excitement of thinking about it.
And whatever you plan doesn’t have to be extravagant. Sometimes it’s enough simply to have something planned that makes you think, I’m so looking forward to that.
Stay Open to Being Moved
Feeling alive isn't the same thing as feeling energetic or excited.
Sometimes feeling alive is being completely absorbed in a novel.
It’s standing in front of a painting longer than you intended.
It’s walking through a historic building and thinking about all the lives that passed through it before yours.
It’s sitting around a table long after dinner is finished because nobody wants the conversation to end.
It’s laughing. It’s longing. It’s noticing. It’s allowing ourselves to still be affected by things.
I never want to become so accustomed to the world that nothing surprises me anymore. I want to stay awake to my life — to keep noticing, discovering, and being moved by what's still ahead.
A Return to Joy
Feeling more alive doesn’t require us to reinvent ourselves or turn our lives upside down. Sometimes we simply need to look up.
To become interested in something new. To make a plan. To return to something we've always loved. To discover something we never knew we loved. To laugh at something ridiculous. To bring beauty into a room — and then actually take the time to enjoy it.
I'll end with two fun recommendations: Here's a song that captures the spirit of this post beautifully. And for a joyful change of pace, watch Bringing Up Baby, the classic screwball comedy from 1938 starring Katharine Hepburn as Susan Vance and Cary Grant as the thoroughly bewildered David Huxley.
Susan is impulsive, daffy, and gloriously over-the-top, and her chaos turns David’s carefully ordered world upside down.
Sometimes we need a beautiful film with great depth and something important to say that inspires us. And then other times, we simply need Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant hilariously chasing a leopard around Connecticut.
“Come, my friends, ’Tis not too late to seek a newer world."
— Alfred, Lord Tennyson, Ulysses
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