Beauty as a Way of Living: A Quiet Form of Resistance

“Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.”
—John Keats

There often comes a time in our lives when we ask ourselves, “How do I want to live going forward?” It may come after a disappointment or a significant life change, or simply growing uneasiness about how we’re living our lives.

For those of us in midlife, it may come after the children leave home, when we go through menopause, experience a health crisis, or face some other kind of loss or change. By this point, we’re not naive. We understand that life doesn’t always unfold exactly as we had planned. And yet, even there, amid life’s sorrows, there were beautiful moments too–even if they were so small we barely noticed them.

I think of holding my father’s hand as he took his last breath. I was full of tears and grief. Yet in that moment, I chose to see the beautiful too. I looked at his hands and thought of how faithfully he had worked to take care of those he loved. I thanked God for the beautiful legacy and example he left for my children and me. I felt grateful to have had him in my life for all these years. In the days following his funeral, I heard from so many whose lives he had touched. There was sorrow, yes, but there was also beauty and kindness. And that helped me bear the grief.

This mingling of sadness and beauty is what it means to be human; it’s a part of life.

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis once said, “Every moment one lives is different from the other. The good, the bad, hardship, the joy, the tragedy, love, and happiness are all interwoven into one single, indescribable whole that is called life. You cannot separate the good from the bad. And perhaps there is no need to do so, either.”

And all of this brings me to my primary point.

We often think beauty is about aesthetics, the way something or someone looks. But that, in itself, is a superficial definition of beauty. It’s so much more than that.

If life is a tapestry of joy and sorrow, then beauty isn’t something we reserve for when circumstances are ideal. It can’t be attributed only to vacations, celebrations, and the seasons of our lives when everything is going well.

Beauty, instead, is a way of seeing and living our lives—as they actually are.

It’s a choice we make.
It’s a discipline that we practice.

It’s something we can choose daily, regardless of our circumstances.
It’s something we can create and tend to, even in small ways and in ordinary or difficult moments.

Living beautifully is not denying sorrow or hardship. It’s noticing, even then, that beauty and beautiful moments can sustain and restore us through those challenging times.

And this choice, to live beautifully, made over and over again, begins to shape our lives and how we see the world.

The Beauty That Endures

Beauty is often misunderstood.

People will ask me, "Why the focus on a beautiful life?"

They ask that because, collectively, we often associate beauty with aesthetics and perfection, something for flawlessly decorated homes or lives that have never suffered hardship or scars.

But the kind of beauty that truly sustains us has never been that surface-level.

I’m thinking of when I walked through an old village in France, where the homes and buildings were centuries old. Their beauty was not found in being flawless, but in what had endured: the cracks in the stone, the weathered shutters with peeling paint, knowing that life had been unfolding there for generations. The windows were open, and I could smell herbs and onions cooking in a home nearby.

This was not perfect beauty; it was lived-in beauty.

I see this same beauty in beloved members of my family who are now in their eighties and nineties. In their crinkled smiles and deeply lined faces, there is a beauty that has been shaped by the years and all their life experiences.

I love this kind of imperfect beauty. I see it everywhere. There is something special about things that have been shaped by time rather than perfected just for display. They are external reminders that life, even with all its imperfections, is still beautiful and worth tending.

Beauty as a Daily Practice

Living a beautiful life doesn’t happen all at once. It happens slowly, through small decisions made day by day.

• It looks like journaling in the morning, listening to what your spirit, mind, and body are trying to tell you.
  
  

• It looks like lighting a candle and putting on some beautiful music instead of tuning into today’s news repeatedly.

  
  

• It looks like picking up the phone to call a friend instead of scrolling through social media.
  

• It looks like paying attention to what nourishes you—rather than what impresses others.
  
  

• It looks like you consciously deciding what you allow into your headspace.
  
  

One of the quiet lies we believe about a beautiful life is that it belongs in another place and another time—some other season of our lives that is not so hectic, or when we live somewhere different, or when we look different, or when we have more money in our bank account.

However, beauty is not postponed until we and our lives are different or better.
It is found in the life we are already living.

• A cup of coffee in the morning, sitting in our comfy chair.
  
  

• Your home arranged with intention—rather than perfection.

  
  

• Listening—truly listening—to a friend as they relay a difficult story.

• Choosing gentleness and kindness in a heated conversation.
  
  

Living beautifully is a lens through which we see our world, from one ordinary moment to the next.

A Way Forward

Beauty teaches us reverence for the ordinary.
It softens and elevates our days.

Beauty is not about creating a perfect life. It is about re-orienting the life you already have towards what is beautiful, and true, and good.

This way of living does not require more money, more time, or different circumstances. It requires intention.

It requires the choice to slow down enough to notice what is already good—and the willingness to shape your days around it.

The beautiful is not rare. It is simply overlooked.

No matter the season you are reading this in, you can begin today.
With one ordinary moment.
With one small, deliberate choice.

That is where a beautiful life begins.

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